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BARELY SINGLE

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I have spent a shockingly large majority of the last seven or so years as someone’s girlfriend , since my first boyfriend in year 8.  Some friends and I were discussing dating history and totalled up the number of months we had spent in relationships, and mine shocked me. What’s more, even in the time between there was always someone on my mind, someone I was pursuing or casually dating. Even in between relationships I was barely single. Dating and spending a lot of time as someone’s partner is certainly not inherently a bad thing, but I know myself, I know my heart, and I know this has happened for not the healthiest of reasons. Time Alone At the start of my last relationship I commented to friends what strange timing it was as I wasn’t looking for anything serious at the time. Of course, they swiftly reminded me of the number of people I had been on dates with in the months preceding it, that would strongly suggest otherwise.   But that’s just dating? That’s different, r
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UNEASY

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I’m just going to come out and say it, I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing. Right now I don’t even know if I’ll graduate, let alone when or where from. I don’t know where I’ll be living a month from now, or what I’ll be doing. I’ve always been such an organised, future thinking person with plan upon back up plan, and yet somehow here I am, getting less than wonderful grades on a degree programme I do not want to do anymore, waiting to find out if I’ll be accepted elsewhere, and in a complete muddle with rent contracts. Yay. Maybe you’ve just graduated and don’t know what your next move will be. Maybe you’re continuing with your degree or job and know exactly what the next move is, but for some reason the apprehension over the future just won’t let go. Ever stopped to think ahead a month or two and found your stomach knotted with unease? Me too, friend, me too. I’m surrounded by friends with excellent grades, impressive work experience and exciting adventures awaitin
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LIVING SACRIFICE

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“So, you’re religious right?” my colleague asks me at the start of my first shift at my new job. “How do you live differently because of your faith?” I mean, nice easy question to break the ice… but still, I tell her. I tell her that I read my bible and pray daily (okay… most days), I tell her I’m saving sex for when I’m married, that I give away a portion of my earnings to church and charities and prioritise going to church on Sunday. That’s basically all there is to it, right? Way back in the depths of the old testament in Genesis 15 God makes Abram a promise, and Abram asks how he can know that it will be true. (source: YouVersion bible app) The sun set, Abram fell into a deep sleep, and “a smoking firepot with a blazing torch appeared and passed between the pieces” where the blood of the cut animals pooled together. With no clear instruction as to what to do with the requested animals, Abram arranged them ready for a ritual treaty. The blood path
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SEEKING GOD'S TRUTH IN A BREAKUP

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You’ve seen the movies. A breakup means a girl crying hysterically, seeking comfort in chocolate and ice cream, tormenting herself for trusting someone with her heart, and wondering if she will ever find love again. Right? Wro- Well, actually I did get through a tub of cookie dough ice cream, so maybe Hollywood got it right. It is hardly uncommon to criticise ourselves and pick flaws, but a breakup can bring about a whole wave of worries, flaws and failures that can damage how we identify ourselves, and leave us feeling empty and vulnerable to the enemies lies.  At the breakdown of my relationship a flood of painful beliefs threatened to drag me under, lies that I am damaged goods, broken beyond repair and categorically unlovable. Every day it is important to hold on to God’s truth about who we are, to guard our hearts from the one who comes to steal and destroy, but never more so than at these low points where our entire identity is on the line. But how? How on earth can
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JOY IN THE TRIALS

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Surprisingly, the verse of the day on my bible app was everything I needed to know this evening. I'm not sure if the selected verses are the same for everyone, personalised, or randomly generated, but if I am honest it is a rarity they are so applicable to my current circumstance. (source: YouVersion bible app) Trials happen, life gets hard sometimes. You can spend all the time in the world asking why and how God can be so good and let it get this bad. The bible tells us that through all the ups and downs, these truths will always hold: 1. GOD IS WITH YOU No matter how far away He may feel he is working for your good. “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” ‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭41:10 NIV‬‬ 2. GOD KNOWS YOUR PAIN When it feels like no one knows quite what you’re going through, God does. I love this verse, “the Spirit himself intercedes for us through w
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